Step 11 Teachings from Buddhist Monk

As part of my Step 11 practice, I am getting around some of the Buddhist Centres in London.

Last night it was the last of a four part teaching on developing patience; how to deal with anger and hatred.

Bits I remember:

Love is the antidote to hatred and anger, hitting pillows may help but the only real way to counteract hatred and anger is with the cultivation of love.

We can learn to cherish others. We can train our minds to think and act differently.

Those who give and are loving to others never go without.

Love and anger are mutually exclusive (hence for the those we resent the Big Book tells us to realise that they, like us, are spiritually sick and we are instructed to show then patience, pity and tolerance).

People change; a person who inflicts pain can later turn out to be our best friend, in this life or the next, perhaps. Even those who inflict unnecessary pain on us. (I started thinking this means I will get back with guy x who rejected me or he will call me and say 'hi I've changed my mind' I doubt this is what the monk was getting as, however)

The talk was not about eliminating anger altogether but helping us deal with it. We all get angry. This is what the Indian masters say from 7 BC.

Analysis and examination is very useful and constructive; when people experience anger there is always borne out of some confusion, greed or fear etc..

We lose our wisdom when we are angry

All people even those who inflict unnecessary pain are the same as we are, deep down we all want to be happy and we ALL have a right to be happy. That is where the analysis and examination comes in.

A story: a monk wanted to have a certain type of visualisation during meditation. He meditated for three years but could not attain the visualisation during that time so he gave up. As he left the monastery he saw a man holding a very big and thick metal pillar, who was rubbing it with a small cloth.

The monk asked him what he was doing. The man holding the pillar said he was rubbing the pillar down so he could make a very fine needle to sew a delicate piece of cloth. The monk than realised how impatient he had been in expecting the visualisation to occur in just three years and kept trying.

This story reminds me of that annoying but true thing-the only thing instant in AA is the coffee.